TikTok content creator @jaythealphamale1st posted a video which received over 427,000 views and 753 comments, describing the controlling relationship her mother has with her. She was specifically detailing an incident where her mother tried to stop her from going on to dinner with a young man, and didn't want her to drive her grandmother's car, even though neither of them own it.
The creator, who also goes by Certified Pimp Playa 100, said she and her mother are currently staying at her grandmother’s home. According to Jay, neither she nor her mother pays bills there, and they share her grandmother’s car because Jay’s own vehicle does not have up-to-date tags.
Jay said the situation began when her mother asked her to spend the night at her uncle’s house because she wanted to have company over. Jay said her grandmother does not allow either of them to have guests over, but her mother planned to have someone come over anyway.
Jay said she initially told her mother that she was feeling sick and did not want to go anywhere, although she might go the following day. The next day, Jay said her mother told her to start packing her belongings so she could go to her uncle’s house. But because of what Jay described as her mother’s demanding tone, she decided she would stay home.
Later that day, Jay said a young man named Jakim, whom she had been talking to for several years, asked her to dinner. They made plans to meet that night, and Jay intended to use her grandmother’s car.
Before leaving, Jay said she told her mother where she was going. According to Jay, her mother immediately tried to stop her. Jay said she was about to turn 20 and did not believe her mother had the authority to decide whether she could go out.
“You have no say. You’re in a house that’s not yours trying to tell me what to do,” Jay said. “And a car that you don’t own.”
According to Jay, her mother argued that it was too late for her to go anywhere and accused her of not asking permission to use the car. Jay said she had planned to ask but felt her mother began yelling at her before she could.
Jay Says Her Mother Has Tried to Control Her for Years
Jay said her mother continued arguing that she had not asked to take the car or go out to dinner. “I didn’t have to ask you. I’m telling you!” Jay recalled telling her. She said she reminded her mother that she was no longer a child and that she was simply letting her know she was leaving. Jay also pointed out that her mother had access to her location and could check where she was if she was concerned about her safety.
Jay said she then called her grandmother and explained that her mother was planning to have company over while also giving her a hard time about leaving with the car.
According to Jay, her grandmother did not want to confront her daughter because she believed doing so would only escalate the situation and potentially lead to her mother taking her frustration out on Jay. Jay said her mother eventually allowed her to leave but demanded the name and contact information of the man she was meeting. Jay refused, saying she did not believe her mother was entitled to that information, and eventually left for dinner.
The following day, Jay said her mother asked whether she wanted to make some extra money by driving to her uncle’s house to do laundry because the washing machine at home was broken. Jay agreed and completed the laundry. But when she returned home and told her mother she planned to go back out, she said her mother again objected.
This time, Jay said her mother told her she should not drive the car because her name was not listed on the insurance. “I’ve driven this car a thousand times,” Jay responded. “Plus, you weren’t worried about the insurance earlier when I went to go do your clothes.”
Jay said she viewed the exchange as another example of her mother trying to control her decisions. She also claimed that her mother had tried to control her choices since she was a child. Jay recalled being prevented from going on amusement park trips with her aunts and uncles because, in her view, her mother wanted to maintain control over her.
Reactions to the video focused on the fact that her mother was unfair and extremely controlling. Other commenters said her mother was abusing her emotionally and sounded narcissistic. One commenter wrote, "No shade but how is she gonna tell you to leave the house so she can have company when it's not even her house?"
Another commenter suggested she stop telling her anything about where she's going. They wrote, "She doing too much, you should stop telling her anything for your own peace of mind."
A separate commenter said her mother sounded abusive and narcissistic. They wrote, "Your mom is abusing you. She sounds narcissistic. Everyone is saying you are both abusing/using your grandma but we have zero info on how your grandma's finances are, how she feels about it, or anything."
The Daily Dot was unable to independently verify the events described in the video, which are based solely on @jaythealphamale1st’s account of her interactions with her mother and their living situation.
