Reddit Woman Says Her Father Expects Her to Help Support Family After College: ‘I Want My Own Life’

A Reddit thread in r/GirlDinnerDiaries created by u/Double-Singer-6631 has received 562 comments and 4,600 upvotes after the user said their parents expect them to help support the family after college.

The father has nine children, including a 4-month-old, 7-year-old, 12-year-old and 16-year-old who still live at home. According to the user, their father has no savings and has used their sister’s credit card to make purchases, including a car.

According to the user, their older sister began helping the family financially a few years ago, and their father later began discussing retirement and relying on his children for financial support.

"My dad approached me today and told me that since I finish my undergrad this summer, he’s so excited for me to start working so I can also begin providing for the family like my sister. He said he wants to stop working soon," the user wrote in the post.

The user said they are also struggling financially and feel their father has not taken their circumstances into account.

"I have no car. I travel so far for my education that I’m physically exhausted, especially because I have an autoimmune disease. My dad has never helped me with anything. I have no money and barely any decent clothes because I’d rather his money go toward the younger kids," the post said.

"Am I wrong for having absolutely no desire to start funding my parents’ lifestyle?" they asked.

The user said their father responded negatively when they raised the issue, "He said, 'Wow, so you want me to work until I’m old? Fine then.' You can’t guilt-trip me like that, dude. You chose to have nine children. I didn’t. Maybe I’ll feel bad about saying all of this later, but right now, I completely resent him."

Reddit users weighed in on the poster’s concerns about supporting their family

Many commenters expressed support for the user, with several questioning whether adult children should be expected to financially support their parents.

Other users also supported the poster and questioned whether adult children should be expected to serve as their parents’ retirement plan.

Some commenters cautioned against romanticizing multigenerational households, saying that living together and saving money is not always realistic for every family. They said there are times when living together and saving money is not a realistic option for a family.

Other commenters emphasized that the Reddit user should be able to make their own decisions about their future. One commenter wrote, "You owe that guy nothing. That’s HIS responsibility! Go live your best life."

The Daily Dot was unable to independently verify the claims made in the post, which are based solely on the author’s account shared on r/GirlDinnerDiaries.